November

November has been kind to me. I have finally been given a school and a start date to go and get my teaching qualification, and I am gonna go in there and kick arse. It's a completely different school and area than I have ever lived in/ worked in before, which will be a challenge but I am so excited to go and teach somewhere completely new, somewhere with different challenges and issues. I am hoping that going back into school will make me want to go back into school; I feel that I don't want to be a teacher anymore once I qualify, which most people get since how badly I was treated in placement 2. I am really enjoying having my evenings to myself, to watch tv and hermit myself, in a good way. I'm really trying to focus on what I want to do if I don't want to teach anymore. It's really hard, I keep saying that 2017 has been the worst year of my life and it has- Jan to June were abysmal and the fact I didn't have an emotional breakdown shocks me and makes me so bloody proud of myself. This is the career I've wanted since I was 11, and that I am so traumatised towards it at the moment is making it hard to want to do it for the rest of my life. 

Onto more positive notes, I have finally found my feet in my job at work and have started making proper mates, I don't feel quite as lonely as I have done since I've moved back home which is really helpful for me and my brain. 

Travelling plans have ramped up dramatically- all of my 11 (gahhhhh) flights are booked, my aunties now coming for my two weeks in Vietnam (hiya comfy hotels!) and I've booked many of my hostels. My current plans are to write a small summary of each country as I go along, so 1) I don't forget anything and 2) so other people might stumble across some info, cos lots of bits I've been really struggling to find online, and being the control freak that I am I just need to know where that boat comes from or where I can get on that bus. When I have more elements, I'm gonna write a post about my plans so far, what shit I've taken with me too, just to see when I come back what has actually been helpful and what hasn't!

I had a week off in November too (which is rare for me) and I made the most of seeing my favourite people and doing absolutely nothing, as it's my last week off before I go travelling in Feb! I went back to Sheffield to see some pals graduate (it was really hard watching the ceremony I should have been in) and some of my best people came to visit me too, which just made me feel so much better and so much more like myself. 

I'm just feeling really quite happy in myself, which I've only ever had brief glimpses of in the past, I know I'm not as skinny as i would like (and I'm rather banking on travelling to help me out with this!) but I'm sort of ok with it currently, I'm being good with my food choices again and I'm maintaining around 11 stone, which is ok to me! Granted this might only last for a week or until tomorrow or until forever but I'm savouring it and feeling quite content. 

And the best part of November for me was seeing The Killers again. Holy shit balls. I just love them and they played my favourite song of all time which I really wasn't expecting as its an album song off Hot Fuss and I would be lying if I said I didn't cry. I was there with my family and were all mega Killers fans and it was just bootiful.

So that's me for November, here's to a very merry December!

Hev